"Woo - Stands for winning others over. You enjoy the challenge of meeting new people and getting them to like you. Strangers are rarely intimidating to you. On the contrary, strangers can be energizing. You are drawn to them. You want to learn their names, ask them questions, and find some area of common interest so that you can strike up a conversation and build rapport. You drive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection. In your world, there are no strangers, just friends you haven't met yet."
According to the Strengthsfinder 2.0, this is my strongest strength. I was given this book from a new boss at work; the entire department was tasked to read it, take a quiz, and then report back on their five strengths. The basic idea behind this book was that instead of focusing on the weak traits, capitalize on what you're great at. Keeping it real here, I've never been one to shy away from what I'm good at. Even as a kid, I didn't like to do things I wasn't good at (i.e. math, organized sports, however in my defense, it was the dumb sports like football and basketball I sucked it, I WAS on the track team, and I was pretty good).
Naturally, being in a room full of strangers isn't something I shy away from. I can be tossed into a room full of people and navigate pretty easily from person to person. When I was in college, I had no problem on the first day of school, or on a new job, I can easily meet the office associates and not feel pressure. Even at a bar, I can smile and say hi to people and not feel like a creeper. I truly love meeting new people. I love making these new connections and putting a name to that familiar face you see at your friend's party or the bar on Saturday.
I'd like to clearly state that I'm not a friend collector on FaceBook. Most of the people on my friends list, I, in fact, do know. The others are people that I would like to get to know. I'm not one to add you simply to have a better looking list. Typically there is a criteria that I have in order to add you. I add you because there's something interesting about you and we have mutual friends or you're super private and I want to see if the former applies.
I think it's dumb to be a bitch or simply unpleasant to someone who is genuinely nice to you. I tend to pride myself on being able to talk to anyone and everyone. If a stranger starts talking to me, I have never dismissed nor acted above that person. Now if the conversation is a complete snoozer, that's a different story. But for the most part, I'm always engaged, I go out of my way to talk to people, the whole nine yards. There's been quite a few occasions involving me going up to people whom I know I've seen around or I'm FB friends with, that have been less than exemplary experiences. By exemplary, I, of course mean I wouldn't use them as case studies for people to go out and strike up a stranger conversation.
One instance involved me seeing a "friend" from FB at a bar and me walking up to him. I mentioned we were friends on FB and wanted to say hi formally. This kid acted like I had asked him for an Indian $2 bill signed by Frida Kahlo. Mind you, we had mutual friends, we had attended the same events, and he still had the nerve to tell me that he and I didn't know each other.
Another event involved me seeing someone while I was on vacation in San Francisco from LA. I went over and introduced myself to him mentioning that I recognized him from LA, the two of us had a nice brief conversation, he laughed at my jokes, and everything seemed cool. I saw him on FB one day, we had mutual friends, I sent him a request and attached a message reminding him of the party we had both attended in SF and nothing.
I even saw a guy at a club that shared more than a few mutual friends with me and ran in the same crowd as me, and attended the same events. I wasn't sure if it was him at the time (I was having issues with my contacts, a new pair, a new fit, apparently one eyeball is shaped like a basketball and the other a football, nothing LASIK can't fix). I digress, it turns out it was him, so I message him stating that I thought it was him and would've come to introduce myself since we're less than two degrees apart and again, nothing!
I'm not complaining that these boys chose not to talk to me, I'm just baffled at the hostility that is thrown upon friendly people. At this this pandemic of bitchiness that stems from LA gays. I've spoken about this with my friends from other cities, and they don't have the same problem, nor are they comprehending why I'm met with animosity. I've always thought I was pretty likeable (at least at first, once you get to know me, my opinions have been known to ruffle more than a few feathers, but I help put them back and even shine them). I've always considered myself a friendly person and one who makes good first impressions. So to be met with such animosity throws me for a loop.
Is this an LA thing? Does the LA stereotype of Angelinos (especially gay ones) hold true? Stuck up? Bitchy? Off-putting? I don't think so, I've met quite a few who don't fit those traits (present company included). I decided not to waste time nor energy on those who care to embody that image. I don't doubt my ability to woo anyone. I will just focus on where the woo-ing is successful. And I predict (if history is good indicator) that it might now work on anyone who doesn't ACTUALLY live in LA.
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